I just found out that I have a brain tumor. Now that can actually mean a lot of different things so that’s why I wanted to talk about it. So I’m going to give a lot of information based on things that I know and how I understand it.
Based on what we know now, it looks like it is a stage three brain cancer. In a normal case with what they’re seeing, what they want to do is remove as much of the tumor as they can and that gives me the best possible outcome.
What seems to be a unique problem with my situation is that the size, location and shape of the tumor is in a place where they can’t really get to it easily. They’re afraid that if they try to remove too much it could do too much damage to the brain where I could risk losing body movement, use of a leg, or an arm, and many other potential cognitive problems too.
For those reasons they can’t take out as much of the tumor because they think it would do a lot of that damage. Which means after my surgery I’m still going to have a piece of tumor still in my head. But it’s important for them to get out as much as they can because of it being a level three cancer. That’s a cancer that is still growing and spreading. After I recover from surgery, I’ll start a process of chemotherapy and radiation to manage the cancer that’s left and hopefully bring it down and get it under control.
We’ve gone through some many different scenarios and possibilities with the doctors and there are roads that lead to positive outcomes. But there it’s definitely a riskier situation than we would like it to be.
But, I am not worried. I’m very confident that this is going to be okay. I’m not sad, worried, or angry even though I know I’m allowed to be.
But it has been a lot to take in. It’s been very emotional and that hasn’t been easy. Not on me or my family.
We could not have come as far as we already have without the support from our community and family. As well as all who have reached out online to support.
I know everything’s going to be okay. Things might be different and that’s okay too.
I wanted everyone to know because I think it’s important. This could be used as a reminder. Life gets so busy, sometimes we leave selfcare to the side. And I don’t mean for something as serious as this, but even for little things. Or even check in on a friend and their health.
I’m so optimistic because I really know as bad as things are, it really could have been worse. And I am so grateful that it is not worse that I just can’t possibly be upset about it.
I want to keep doing this. I appreciate everyone’s support and I’m sure people will continue to support me. I’m going to keep going. It might look a little different for a little while, Cam’s designing a hat.
I’ve got hundreds of puppetry videos to keep you busy while I am gone.
But you might see a bunch of new stuff too. For the last two years I have been working on like 30 new secret projects. And so many of them are like 80% done.
I definitely want to make some of those a priority and so you might see some things that might seem random coming out.
Another secret project I started this year is a whole other YouTube channel and already posted about 300 videos since January. I was designing the “Nimalz Kidz” channel as a resource for school teachers.
The music! I wrote like 30 songs in the last two years. We recomposed all that music four our stage show “The Littlest Snow Monster.” We wanted to make a “made for TV” style movie for it for YouTube. We wanted to give it an “Emmet Otter’s Jug-Band Christmas” kind of feel visually. And a whole bunch of other music videos with puppets that I’ve been writing the lyrics to and having composed.
I might start rolling some of this stuff out a little faster. Not because I am worried about time, because I am going to get through this. But because the physical kind of work I can do might change while I am healing due to my condition.
Thank you so much for being a fan of puppetry. That’s why I do this.
One thing that made these paths two weeks bearable in a really hard time, was it right before Camp Puppet. I found out about my diagnosis right before camp. I thought doing camp might be too much to handle going through this discovery process as it was taking a toll on my family. I was afraid I would have to cancel.
But since it was so last minute, I didn’t have the heart to cancel. And I am so glad I didn’t. It turned out that it was exactly what I needed.
Even though I already knew it, it just solidified why I make my videos. And why I even changed my YouTube channel name to “Puppet Nerd.”
Camp Puppet was a long puppetry adventure. In the sessions we build a puppet, learn performing techniques, create a personality for our puppets, film a skit, then the final puppet party where we view the skits!
And now that sounds great, but what really makes it so special and the whole Puppet Nerd channel so special to me is that…
We ARE Puppet Nerds.
So many people reading this are likely the only puppet person in their area/community. Or are the only Puppet Nerd in their school. If you’re lucky you got a couple friends into it too, but so often in so many niches and art forms you’re kind of the one weirdo by yourself.
And the Puppet Nerd YouTube channel it’s just a place where we can all be nerds together. It’s a place where we fit in as weirdos.
I already knew this, but seeing that firsthand with all these kids these last two weeks got me through these two weeks.
So if you’re reading this and for some reason you’re not a Puppet Nerd, please give puppetry a chance.
Puppetry is for everybody.
Puppetry is the perfect art form because it is a combination of every art form in one.
I dare you to give puppetry a chance.
I plan on keeping people updated on the situation. Updates on this will be on the “Kreutinger Puppets” Facebook page.
Again thank you all for your support! Stay positive, I’m staying positive. And I’m confident we’re going to get through this.
Buffalo, NY 14231-0774